Do You Embarrass Yourself With These Negotiating Mistakes?

In my interview about negotiation with Camp Group CEO Jim Camp, he pointed out to be the difference between tactics and principles.

As a pilot in the Air Force, he was taught that a principle will always beat a tactic. So, it’s very important to take a look at the difference between a tactic and a principle.

A tactic is something that is designed to take advantage of a weakness in the opponent.

A principle is something never-changing and consistent.

I will illustrate the above with an example from the negotiation for the purchase of a new car. We will see the tactic of using reciprocity and guilt versus the principle of honesty.

We’ve all seen it on television and in the movies and we’ve probably all had it happen to us at one time or another: Good Guy Bad Guy. This classic negotiation tactic is still taught and still applied frequently.

At the car dealership, it goes like this: You have decided on the make and model of the car you want and now you are negotiating the price. The salesperson excuses himself to go talk to the sales manager about the price you’ve requested. He comes back and says that he really fought for you and was only able to get the sales manager to agree to a small discount.

So, again, he says he’ll go to bat for you and go above the sales manager and talk to the general manager, even though this is putting his job at risk, he really wants to help.

Perhaps someone who is young and going through their first negotiation might fall for this classic tactic. But, anyone who has been through some negotiations or who has studied negotiation will immediately see this tactic for what it is.

Here is where the showdown between tactic and principle takes place. The principle here is that of honesty. Honesty is valued by people and necessary to conduct proper business. Regardless of how well the salesperson executes the Good Guy Bad Guy tactic, if there is even a hint of dishonesty about it, the plan will implode and the buyer will lose confidence and respect for the salesperson.

Yes, he may still purchase the vehicle if the price works for him, but we can be sure that he won’t be sending any referrals to this salesperson and that the salesperson career will be short-lived.

Never try to use a tactic that is going to compete with a principle. Anytime you try to implement a negotiating tactic, think it through and be sure that it is backed by proper principles.

Negotiation Secrets Resolve Conflicts

What skills do you employ when trying to resolve conflicts? The answer should be, the same skills you use when negotiating.

Conflict resolution is a subset of negotiation and thus, the better you are at negotiating, the better you’ll be at resolving conflicts. The information that follows gives insight into how you can enhance your negotiation and conflict resolution efforts.

1. Listening:

a. In any negotiation, when attempting to resolve conflicts, really understand the other person’s perspective and assess the basis for the conflict.

b. Consider the source of the other person’s motivation that stimulates his beliefs, thoughts, and desires for the outcome he’s striving to achieve. Seek to understand his perspective at an intellectual and emotional level. Ask open-ended questions (i.e. questions that require more than a yes or no response) to solicit insight as to why he holds such beliefs to be valid.

c. Ascertain who and/or what the source of his beliefs, thoughts, and desires are that’s generating the outcome he seeks. If you determine that there’s a vast conflict between the position you hold and his, cite sources from references that he believes to be credible, in an attempt to sway his viewpoint.

2. Patience:

a. Prior to responding with a rebuttal, be sure you understand the gist of the other person’s position. Let him talk. The more he talks, the greater the opportunity to glean additional insight and information about his mindset.

b. Watch rhetoric, yours and the other individual. Words have meanings and some words may convey thoughts that are different from the intent you meant. Be sure to use words that the other person understands and applies in the same manner as you intended for him to perceive.

c. If you are slow to respond to questions, you give the impression that you’re reflective. Answer a question too quickly and you could give the impression that you’re being flippant. Strike a balance between the two modes, based on the situation at hand.

3. Use of language:

a. Once you understand the other negotiator’s perspective, assess the viability of his beliefs, based on the verbiage he uses. Some words, such as, “I believe” versus “I know” or “I’m sure of”, conveys the degree to which he believes his thoughts to be accurate. In observing the manner in which he uses words, you’ll be able to peer into his beliefs and begin to determine the level of commitment he has for the outcome he seeks.

b. If you cannot oblige the outcome the other person seeks, explain in language that he can understand (use words he uses) why you can’t oblige him.

c. Avoid using inflammatory language. An ill word cast at an inappropriate time, will deflate the conversation and most likely, create a more negative environment.

4. Tone and pace of voice:

a. Align the tone and pace of your voice to the situation and strategy you’ve adopted. If the situation calls for a display of empathy, display it. If on the other hand, it’s more appropriate to allow the timbre of your voice to convey a more steadfast position, display that demeanor. Unless it’s part of your strategy, don’t be backed into a position you can’t, or don’t want to defend.

b. Keep in mind, a good thought/plan delivered with the appropriate demeanor can soften rejection, or enhance acceptance.

c. Try not to interrupt the other person when he’s speaking. Take note of how long he delivers his position and be aware of when he starts to repeat himself. Regardless of whether the other person starts to pontificate, don’t over talk him.

Just because you silence a man doesn’t mean you’ve converted him. In order to gain benefits from the resolution of a conflict, you must delve deep enough into the psychological mind of the other individual to emotionally and intellectually understand his perspective. You must know what holds sway with him; in order to do so, you have to experience his reality. Once you’re able to comprehend his perspective, you’ll be prepared to offer a solution to his situation. If the intersection between what you’re capable of delivering and what he needs intersects, success will lie at that junction… and everything will be right with the world. Remember, you’re always negotiating.

The Negotiation Tips Are…

• A conflict is nothing more than disparate positions. Never become mentally burdened as the result of a conflict. Understand the source of it before attempting to address it.

• In our everyday lives, we participate in conflict resolutions. If you take note and utilize some of the same tactics and strategies you employ in your negotiations, you’ll enhance your ability to resolve conflicts.

• Resolve in your mind that you’ll reduce tension in your personal and business life, by enhancing your communications with those you encounter. Become more adept at conflict resolution.

Quick Shopping Strategy to Find Easy Presents

Know one thing that’s in very short supply nowadays? Time. And that means there’s a definite need for a quick shopping strategy to find easy presents to get that bad boy under control.

Yes, time is surely something that needs to be managed effectively to get the most out of each person’s day. And one way to circumvent the obstacles in regards to gift shopping is to consider unique Gift Baskets as part of the shopping arsenal.

The first reason is that there are so many themes to this alternative that at least one should match the interests, appetites or hobbies of the recipient. Like what?

Let’s start with the edible shopping alternatives that are offered. These include easy presents in a basket packed with victuals such as chocolate, coffee, tea, and foods that are gourmet, Italian, spicy… and even healthy. Yes, any of these may be precisely what the receiver may be longing for.

And in case the lucky recipient of your generosity has a high level of interest in such things as movies, casinos, gardening, golf, and NASCAR… there are unique Gift Baskets for those as well… What else?

Know a lady who loves to luxuriate in warm, soothing splendor? And who loves a bit of pampering now and then? There’s a quick shopping choice for her known as Bath Spa Gift Baskets. These are brimming with everything she needs to feel good about things for a time.

And guys? Well, there are easy presents for them also. These can consist of unique Gift Baskets dealing with cars, cigars, motorcycles, handyman… and all sorts of other “guy stuff”.

What about certain life events that you wish to commemorate… like new babies, weddings, birthdays, new home? Yes, there are treasures in a basket for these as well.

There are even get-well and sympathy baskets out there to raise someone’s spirits when they’re down. These certainly can be a boost to anyone’s life when things aren’t going their way.

And another great reason to buy unique Gift Baskets? They can be shopped for and set up for delivery in a matter of minutes online. Yes, that means while sitting in front of your computer where you are right now. Why not let technology make your life so much easier?

So there you have it as far as gift shopping – both effectiveness and efficiency. That’s the ticket to keeping time where it belongs… under your total command and control!